Thursday, May 2, 2013

Today's Horoscopes


Leo at a funeral.

Virgo on a coffee break.

Pisces on Picture Day at school.

Gemini first thing in the morning.

Scorpio's prom photo.



Capricorn during an intellectual conversation with their significant other.

Libra's family reunion.

Aquarius on Weight Watchers.


Cancer on Christmas morning.
Sagittarius studying for exams.

Aries' Friday night.

Taurus in the middle of a heated political debate.
 

Sunday, April 14, 2013

I Dated the Zodiac

We're thrilled that you're here.  Allow us to briefly explain what will be happening.

It's a crazy world out there, full of all sorts of nutty energy, loud personalities, and Virgos.  And although dating makes us want to beat someone over the head with a 2x4, run them over with our cars, and then smother them with a pillow can be hard, we continue to do it anyway.  Why?

We're looking for love.

The zodiac provides us with a great multitude of personalities, and one can't help but note the similarities.  Geminis are one extreme, then the other; Leos are vain; Virgos are all things bad; and so on and so on and so on.

I Dated the Zodiac is an upcoming ebook that tracks one girl's adventures in dating--all 12 signs.  It explores the various personalities of the zodiac and why the human race is basically doomed the qualities and tendencies they possess.  It'll be the perfect read for anyone who loves making fun of everyone astrology.

If you'd like to continue ripping on people more factual information regarding romance and astrology, here is I Dated the Zodiac's Twitter, Facebook, and StumbleUpon.  The ebook will be out shortly, brought to you by the authors of The Penis Chronicles.  (Still confused?  You're an idiot.  Clear here.)  It'll be a quick page-turner, perfect for while you're pooping.

Namaste.